Sometimes...Sometimes

Just because it didn't happen for me like it did for him or her; doesn't mean that my life is any less worthwhile. I dreamt of you last night. Even in my dream I stepped aside. I'm always doing that; stepping aside. Then I was holding a baby, which is a sign of renewal. Something new for me. Something worthwhile which will make me realize one day that I was better off. But sometimes...sometimes...no matter how much I move on to be a better person and move past it all, sometimes this will happen in my day to remind me like it did today.

I realized that there was nothing for me in this country right now and that maybe that is where I should go to maybe get out and get away from everything here which reminds me of how much sometimes things don't feel like they're moving forward and everyone is finding something for themselves but me. Maybe that's why... maybe I am supposed to leave. Maybe that's why *insert all I'm feeling but don't want to reveal out loud here.*